One of these days

Staring at the screen and drawing a blank. This is one of these days I hate like no other, I'm not satisfied with what I did, I think it's all in vain anyway because the performance of my city is too bad, I look at the scripting work that's coming soon and see that not even a simple script to close doors works properly. I doubt the whole PW concept and think I should've started a singleplayer mod, because PWs never turn out as you want to. I wonder if any player who'd join would actually be fun to roleplay with, or if NPCs might not be the nicer alternative, and even larger in numbers. I see new custom content I want to use, but already lost track of the stuff I already have in my haks and don't dare to touch it. The stupid toolset crashes again when I open Rungholt after working on a different area, I restart the toolset countless times a day. I hate the interiors I made, and how zooming out the camera ruins he immersion, while zooming in in character mode ruins the playability. Did I ever mention there's nothing worse than seeing the person you play with uses WASD walk? I don't know why, but I always think that person has some liters of Coke inside, potato chips on the table and plays a quick round of NWN before returning to Unreal Tournament. Of course that's bullshit, but still...

I think my Roleplay sucks. I'm not up for the task of DMing in the world I create. Talk about finding a lead DM when I also need a lead scripter, builder, custom content guy and what else I'm too stupid for but do anyway.

I want that signed Storm of Zehir copy so I get at least one birthday present this year ( I slept away that day), I want autodownloaders just to work, I want to have a fun and immersive place to RP in (Middleforest? I dunno, I doubt that at the moment), and... meh. I need a creativity dose, some new ideas that I can actually work into the mod without failing miserably or getting bad headaches. Saw an awsome modification at the vault today and wish I had the patience and technical skill to do that - at least I know I could've made the exterior a little nicer, that's already something, huh? But I think I'm making yet another NWN2 mod instead of something unique when I see that. I'm scratching more and more things from the list that I wanted to do at some point, simply because it's way too much work. Talk about custom classes, class changes, rule changes... meh. I cannot even find the patience to update that stupid nekkid-hak I created (what did I create that for anyway when I'm probably not even using it...?).

Windows terrorizes me too. Can't we have a Mac toolset? At least on the Mac side I have that GB RAM more that Windows is too stupid to see, and that's probably the GB Runholt needs to stay stable.

Oh, I don't like chatrooms too... yeah, Dammendrech has one and it's what I mean. While some people are fun to talk to outside of the game, some you wish would just... don't talk when they don't play... it's hard to RP with a character you might actually like when you know the player is someone you'd avoid. To prevent that, I don't want anything like a chatroom for Middleforest, no-ho. But first we need a Middleforest anyway, then players, then we can talk about stuff like chats.

So, enough rambling for today, my computer has finished the disk repair, defragment and whatever routine and is free for toolsetting again. Damn what a day.